2013

I graduated high school. I wasn't proud of myself; I didn't deserve a celebration of any kind. I felt so much shame. I had begged my mom not to make me go with my dad, and she said that he would be there because he supported me finacially. I walked away from the graduation ceremony. I had no connection to any of my classmates and teachers. I flipped off my parents...I knew I was going to be in a lot of trouble. I couldn't be angry. I was angry a lot, but just inside.

I fell in love with Edward Snowden, though who didn't? Truly an American Hero.

I started dating a new guy; my ex's best friend. He seemed like he was such a sweet person. The charges were a surprise. I was so in love with him. He was the first cutie pie. Losing him to the System was horrific. That was the worst time in my life until 2019.

2014

In the fall I took my first college classes. I felt old. I felt so alone; I thought college would be different.

I got new birth control, the nexplanon implant. It stopped my periods. I didn't understand at the time why that was so signifigant. It felt so much better not having that reminder every month that my body could do something so abhorrant to me.the nexplanon implant held next to a white forearm